Rowan Spazzoli

Strategist. Lecturer. Consultant

Thesis draft submitted!

My first complete draft of my thesis has been submitted. Many pages and many, many words.

I’ve been working for 20 hours straight so I think it’s sleepy time.

*yay*


Image of my face and my thesis. Yes I have a man bun. No I don’t care that you don’t like it <3

Blog: 351/365. Click here to read about my #365of25 journey
Song of the day: Major Happy - Fred V & Graffi

P.s. thank you to everyone for getting me this far <3

Pause. Look up

I often get overwhelmed when I’m working. I have a sudden realisation about the volume of work that needs to be covered. Or I can’t get through the complexity of something, which throws me off course.

My normal approach used to be to double down. To force myself through. To sit in my chair and stare at the screen until something came to me.

The issue is that this made me more anxious. And compounded the problem I was facing.

But I’ve started something new.

When I first get overwhelmed I stop what I’m doing. I leave my computer. I go outside to my favourite bench.

I pause.

And I look up.

I allow myself to sit in that spot. And look up at the trees, across to the yachts in the dock or into this distance at Table Mountain and Signal Hill.

For as long as I want.

I pause until I get clarity. Until I am able to calm myself.

Once I feel like I have managed to do so, I get back up and go inside. And I am able to tackle the problem or overcome the obstacle.

Sometimes you don’t need brute force.

Sometimes you just need to pause. And look up


Image was taken looking up at the tree from my favourite reflection spot at the business school 🙂

Blog: 350/365. Click here to read about my #365of25 journey
Song of the day: Stars Fall Down - The Parlotones

P.s. thank you to everyone for the kind words after my last post <3

Leverage your position, change the world

I remember getting to Grade 8 and feeling like a tiny ant compared to the staff and older students. I remember getting to my first year of university and feeling very small and insignificant compared to the lecturers and senior students. And I know that since finishing my undergrad I’ve felt like a tiny speck compared to the grown ups in the working world.

But I also remember being in Grade 12 and feeling like I could get anything done at the school. I remember getting the assistant lecturer position and feeling like I had access to the whole university. And now I feel like I’ve gotten roots in the working world.

There are many situations where a group of people will have significantly less power in their environment. This could be because of age or work experience…. but it can also be along race, gender or sexual orientation lines as well as other imbalances caused by the past.

When you’re in a position of power, whether as a Grade 12 student, a lecturer or someone higher up in a work environment, you can leverage your position to help those with less power. This might be as simple as introducing them to the right people or advocating for them when necessary.

The same applies to situations of historical imbalance.

It’s easy to say “there’s nothing I can do about the past.”

But you can.

Leverage your position. Help change the world.


Image was taken at the prom yesterday 🙂

Blog: 349/365. Click here to read about my #365of25 journey
Song of the day:Matthew Mole -Have I told you

P.s. I know I’ve been a bit slow on the blogs. But I’m still determined to get them done soon 🙂 

Tie the habit to the addiction

The process of building habits fascinates me, which may be because I struggle to form good habits and break bad ones. I even got a book on the topic, The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg, which I would highly recommend.

I’ve also written about things that help me form habits. These include announcing your goals so that social pressure can influence you and committing to pay an amount if you fail to implement a habit.

Recently though, I’ve found another useful way to maintain a habit. And that is to tie a habit to an addiction.

This came about from my love of a certain smoothie store at the Waterfront food market. The smoothies are quite expensive, so I’ve been trying to ease up on buying them. However, I realized that I could use this addiction to my advantage. I’ve decided that I’m allowed to have one on any day, as long as I have completed 2 hours of thesis work before hand.

The obstacle to getting my smoothie isn’t massive (I considered making it 4 or 6 hours of work). Instead, it’s just the right amount of time for me to setup my work for the day and get some momentum. But not too much for me to completely stop my addiction.

So if you’re looking to start a new habit, look at something you’re hooked on. And tie your goals into that.

Use your addiction to your advantage.


Image was taken at the waterfront in October 🙂

Blog: 348/365. Click here to read about my #365of25 journey
Song of the day:Tie me down - Gryffin with Elley Duhe

P.s. I know I’ve been a bit slow on the blogs. But I’m still determined to get them done by the end of the year 🙂 

The Follow Through

Over the past few days I’ve hit a bit a slow patch with work. Nothing too serious, but it feels like I’m wading through thick mud. So I took some time off this afternoon to walk to the promenade and reflect.

On my walk I realized that one of my key weaknesses was starting to show again. And that weakness is my inability to follow through. I’ll start projects that really excite me, and pursue them with a great energy. But I get distracted when the project has been going on for too long or if something new comes along. 

I know this is an inherent part of my personality. It’s a trait that I’ve been aware of for quite a long time. And I know that something like this doesn’t change overnight. But I’d like to focus and follow through on my three existing projects.

The three projects are:

  1. My masters dissertation (yes, I know this has been dragging on)
  2. The Matter Innovation report
  3. The #365of25 project

In an ideal world, I’d like to have these done by the 7th of December, before the summer holiday season begins. This would give me two weeks to get through as much as possible. However, I know these things take longer than I expect and that putting myself under pressure isn’t the best way to be effective.

So I’m setting myself a deadline for the projects of the 14th of December. Before the christmas parties and before the holidays are in full swing.

I’ve had a phenomenal year. And it’s time to end it off in style.


Image is from my prom walk this afternoon 🙂

Blog: 347/365. Click here to read about my #365of25 journey
Song of the day: Lady Zamar - My baby

Friday Shoutout: Mo Malele

“My brilliance is best unfiltered, so take me as I am or don’t take me at all”

– Mo Malele

Today’s Friday shoutout goes to Mo Malele, one of the main people that motivated me to pursue my own path. Mo is one of the most exhilarating, creative and inspiring people I have ever had the fortune of interacting with. During our post grad accounting degree she made the leap to follow her dream, which catalyzed me into doing the same.

Side note: the motto used in our accounting degree by the lecturers was “#StayWithTheHerd”…. this didn’t sit well with Mo and Me. So our motto became #DeviateFromTheHerd

Mo has just started a blog for her writing and other creative pursuits. She also performs spoken word poetry and is soon to record an album. Oh, and she’s a Director Of Marketing And Business Development at BSK Marketing and was previously at P&G. 

You can follow her blog here  or at the address below:

https://momalele.wordpress.com/

And here is a video of her performing some of her spoken word:


Thank you for helping me find my own path Mo, for being so wonderful, and for taking the leap to #deviatefromtheheard


Image is of Mo and me on Jammie Plaza in 2016, after we decided to #deviatefromtheherd

Blog: 346/365. Click here to read about my #365of25 journey
Song of the day: Muse - Algorithm

Taming the Boggart

Have you ever had a fear or anxiety that can’t be explained? Something that materializes out of nowhere. It’s a dark shadow, and seems to adapt itself in to whatever might scare you the most. And it washes over you with a flood of anxiety at the least ideal moment.

These are the types of anxieties that other people would find weird. For example, I get really anxious when going shopping for clothes. I don’t know where this comes from. But I know that if I have to buy myself clothes I put it off for months, and then go into a mall with a very specific intention… to get one item and one item only

I chatted to my therapist this week about it and we came up with a great analogy for it. We called this fear “The Boggart” (from Harry Potter for those among you who are uncultured).

boggart is an amortal shape-shifting non-being that takes on the form of the viewer’s worst fear. Because of their shape-shifting ability, no one knows what a boggart looks like when it is alone, as it instantly changes into one’s worst fears when one first sees it

– from http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Boggart

The fear or anxiety that we have in these situations might have no distinguishable source, or is as a result of a long forgotten memory. So it takes the shape of whatever might scare you most. Essentially, your own boggart.

And the best way to deal with a boggart?

  1. Have someone else around to try and confuse it– this would involve speaking to a friend or therapist about it
  2. Use the “ridikulous” charm – this requires firm concentration and turning the fear into an object of fun.

So when you’re next faced with your own personal boggart, don’t let it defeat you. Instead, bring someone in and highlight the ridiculousness of the fear. And pretty soon you’ll be able to water it down and wash it away.


Image was taken on the last day of packing up my old apartment

Blog: 345/365. Click here to read about my #365of25 journey
Song of the day: Ehrling - I feel good

The Special Day

“What are you going to be doing on your special day?”

This came up a few times today. Friends and family asking what exciting things I had planned for my birthday. 

And to be honest, I hadn’t thought about it all that much. I’ve planned a dinner at the end of the week, but for my actual birthday I wasn’t too concerned with doing anything different.

“I hope you’re not going to be working”

Another common message I got today. That I should not subject myself to anything that I didn’t want to do.

But what I wanted to do today was pretty much what I do every Tuesday. It went something like this:

  • A morning coffee and some music
  • A phone call with my mom
  • Weekly therapist session
  • Some general admin (dropping off a box of donations, getting car things done)
  • Some thesis work
  • An interview with someone for my consulting project
  • Lunch at the waterfront (with friends)
  • A little bit more research and work
  • A sneaky visit to my uncle for tea
  • Spending time with close friends and having a few drinks
  • Writing my blog and listening to my favourite music

And as I started writing this blog I realised something. 

That this was a special day. And it was also a normal day.

I realised that I’ve gotten to a point where every day is special. That I’m doing exactly what I want. And that I wouldn’t want to do anything different.

My work is part of the joy. My flexibility allows me space and time with friends. And the things I do every day light me up.

And so for my “special day” today I did exactly what I do every day.

And it was wonderful


Image was taken from my uncles apartment 🙂

Blog: 344/365. Click here to read about my #365of25 journey
Song of the day: Leventina ft Syntheticsax - Here workin' (Dinka Remix)

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