Life has become more complex and difficult by an order of magnitude over the last year. And I can’t tell whether it’s just because of the pandemic, or because it’s of the passage into the middle part of my life. It’s likely that the answer is that it’s both.
It’s left me with a constant feeling of being overwhelmed. Like there is an insurmountable about of things going on, of problems to deal with and help that is needed. The responsibilities have multiplied, and the stakes are so much higher than I’ve ever experienced.
I know that I’m in a process of stepping up, that I’ll eventually look back at this time with pride, at how I was able to deal with so much, while being in a pandemic.
But tonight I realised, in a profound way, that I’m really not on my own on this. That there are lights in my life, people to help illuminate the way, to shine through the darkness, and to reflect back to me the progress that I’ve made and how much brilliance there is to come.
I feel like my own light was just given a little more glow. Like one candle lighting another. And that the same spark I give out into the world is the same spark that will help bring back my fire when I feel like it is dying down.
And in the most serendipitous way, the song that played on shuffle when I got back in the car tonight captured this so beautifully for me:
Hang on to the light in your eyes and the feeling
Hang on to your love drunk original reason
Hang on to the small town you love but you’re leaving
Oh you won’t be a fool for so long
So hang on
Song of the day: Hang on – Needtobreathe