Rowan Spazzoli

There are two events on a plane trip that I observe with fascination. These are:

1. People queuing at the gate before boarding has begun
2. People who stand the moment the plane has landed (and, if they’re near the window, stand awkwardly under the baggage)

In a normal line, such as at the bank, you need to stand and wait. Because the sooner you get to the front, the sooner you get to leave.

This isn’t the case for getting on and off the plane. The only bonus to getting on to the flight early is maybe extra baggage space. That’s it. And standing up as the plane lands does not make the bag carousel move faster.

It’s temping to try follow the crowd in these situations. But it yields absolutely no benefit, and you’ll have to stand uncomfortably.

Try not to be a sheep

Image is in Lanseria airport, before the plane had started boarding

Blog: 281/365

Song of the day: In my head - Axwell

Today my blog crossed 10 000 total views.

I started this blog as a way to develop my thoughts and share them with the world. And to see that the world (a small part of it) has been watching is so exciting.

There have been a number of people who have read every single post. To those people, thank you. You keep me motivated and give me great feedback.

Here’s to another 10 000 views 🙂

Image is from a walk on the prom this afternoon

Blog: 280/365

Song of the day: Ten Thousand - Emilie & Ogden

A lot of the psychological work I’ve done this year has involved freeing myself. Freeing myself from my own preconceptions. Freeing myself from my perceptions of what society expects of me. Freeing myself from the things that scare me.

And as I’ve been untangling this, I’ve noticed that I’ve become open to new experiences. And I’ve become more comfortable with things being generally chaotic.

This, in turn, means I’m more prepared to adventure. To take risks. And to do things that I’ve never been done before.

As I’ve fixed my internal world, the external world has become more vivid.

Adventure awaits

Image is from our trip away. We were throwing everything we had at catching a fish 🙂

Blog: 279/365

Song of the day: Styx - Come Sail Away

I saw a video of Seth Godin yesterday where he gives a way of thinking about why we would fear judgement. In a tribe, if you put yourself out there and went wrong, you could be kicked out the tribe and then probably die.

But now days, it matter’s far less. If a group of people start ignoring you or hating you, it might suck. But you are unlikely to die of cold because of it.

In fact, putting yourself out there is more likely to bring more people in. For example, since starting this blog I’ve become more connected with existing friends and family because of it. And I’ve had a number of people reach out to me, from entrepreneurs to government officials.

We still carry around the fear of judgement. It’s hard wired into us.

And the best way to get through it is to train yourself that it doesn’t matter. And you can do this by putting yourself out there, again and again.

Until the feeling fades.

And you’re able to express yourself, exactly as you want to.

Image was taken in our last night of our holiday 🙂

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Song of the day: Majozi - Waiting

Everyone has had to do a hard reset on a piece of technology before. Whether it’s holding down the buttons on a phone or pulling the battery out of a laptop. We’re not entirely sure how it works, but sometimes when something is on the fritz it’s best to just disconnect it and start over again.

This past holiday was that hard reset for me. A complete disconnect. A restart. Removing the battery, dusting off and trying again.

And now the loading screen has finished doing it’s thing. I’ve been rebooted and I’m ready to take things on again 🙂

Image was taken on an early morning fishing excursion on our holiday

Blog: 277/365

Song of the day: Jay-Z - Forever Young

In a previous blogpost I mentioned that our group of high school friends make an effort to go away at least once a year. As part of this, we’ve established a great tradition: The Ashes Tournament.

The Ashes is a competition between the five friends (or between the regions were the friends live, e.g. Joburg vs Cape Town). Whenever we have our holidays, we dedicate the last night to the tournament. We’ll choose a game and set the rules, and the winner holds the title until the next vacation.

This all started during an online match last year. The two from Joburg bet a bottle of whiskey that they could beat the team from Cape Town in a FIFA tournament.

Sadly, the Joburg team won.

And when I was in Switzerland, I bought them a bottle of whiskey. The size hadn’t been specified, so I bought a small bottle. Just to spite them. But I bought a very rare type of whiskey from the distillery itself. So it was quite special.

Here’s a picture of them with their prize:

When we met up in August last year we formalized the tournament. The boys from Joburg drank their whiskey, shared a little with us, and all five of us smoked cigars together. We then put the ashes in the whiskey bottle and the ashes floating trophy was born. (The name is a play on the ashes from the famous England vs Australia cricket tournament).

Then, another FIFA tournament was held, with a “best of five” format chosen. The team from Joburg went 2-0 up, but our team from Cape Town fought back valiantly to claim a 3-2 victory.

It was a spectacular win, and we were sure to be petty about our victory all the way home. 

Here is me being petty, holding the trophy (and belt) in a field of yellow flowers

Here is me being even more petty by holding the trophy (and belt) under a double rainbow:

This year, we held a round robin Tekken tournament. After the first round we were basically all tied. And after the second, one person from the Joburg team and one from the Cape Town team made it into the final.

Sadly, a member of the Joburg team won again.

A Great Tradition

This tournament has created some phenomenal banter, from both sides. And, more importantly, it has established a great tradition in our friend group.

The trophy will go around for many years from now. We’ll hold the tournaments once we have each gotten married. We’ll continue when we have families. And continue to do so when we’re in the old age homes.

And finally, we had a really bittersweet realization when we were chatting about the tournament this week. One day (hopefully in the very distant future), there will only be one of us left. The last member of the crew. The final winner of the trophy.

And it is both a very sad and very beautiful thought that one day, one of us might be buried with the trophy…..

And have ALLLLLLLL the bragging rights in the afterlife 🙂

Image was taken on the last day of the ashes and belt being in the mother city. But don’t worry, I’ll be bringing them back next year 🙂

Blog: 276/365

Song of the day: Queen - We are the champions

As we move from being children to being adults, our relationships with people in our lives change. Where we used to interact with parents, uncles/aunts, god parents, family friends as children, we now interact with them as fully grown people.

However, sometimes this transition is difficult. Playing the role of the child might be ingrained into us. Or the adult might be used to treating us as a kid.

And this can lead to strained relationships, where a person in their 20s is too dependent on their parent. Or where a parent is too overbearing on their now-adult son or daughter.

One of the best remedies for this is to set boundaries. To decide what you want from your relationship and make sure that you stick to this.

For example, if a parent puts too much pressure regarding careers or finding a spouse, set a boundary where they are aware that you don’t wish to speak with them about such issues.

It’s difficult to establish, but once you set some boundaries you’ll likely find that you’re less stressed and that your relationship improves

Image was taken on our friend vacation this week 🙂

Blog: 275/365

Song of the day: Taylor Swift - Bad Blood

Apart from playing computer games, we’ve spent a substantial portion of the holiday fishing. We haven’t caught a single thing yet, but I’ve realised that catching fish is only part of the enjoyment.

If the enjoyment lay exclusively in catching the fish, then we could just go to a trout farm, drop a line in one of the tanks and nab a fish

But that’s not where the fun lies.

Instead, most of the joy in fishing is before you ever catch a fish.

It’s waking up early and seeing the sun rise. It’s watching the steam rise off the lake with the mountains in the background. It’s talking to other fishermen and asking them what techniques they’re using. It’s getting the perfect cast.

And it’s in having a beer with friends in nature.

Catching the fish is great. But most of the fun happens before that.

Image was taken in Clarens on our 2014 holiday 🙂

Blog 274/365

Song of the day: Old Pine – Ben Howard