Rowan Spazzoli

Strategist. Lecturer. Consultant

Thinking about play

After some lengthy discussions today, I realised that my distractibility/ loss of focus is not the cause of my low work rate, but potentially just a symptom.

I’ve begun to understand that I get distracted when I’m not sure where to start. When I have a blank page in front of me.

And that’s because I’m so scared of writing down something that’s wrong.

And then I end up writing nothing at all.

This perfectionism keeps me frozen. And in a desperate bid for gratification, I lose focus and turn to other, more instant sources.

So I need to develop my ability to play. To be wrong. And to put down words, even if they get deleted later.

I need to be less scared, and be more comfortable with exploring.

Image was, once again, taken on the prom šŸ™‚ (it may have not uploaded. If so, I’ll edit it tomorrow)

Blog: 189/365

Song of the day: Redbone – Childish Gambino

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In Focus

I feel that I have gotten really good at creating an environment that is ideal for work. I walk or cycle to the business school, I set up my computer with an extra screen and I play the music that I work best to.

And this environment works really well. Sometimes.

But I find there are times where I struggle to focus regardless of the environment. Even if the work is enjoyable, I get easily distracted and then get frustrated with myself.

A prime example is today. I managed a good morning of work but by the afternoon I got so distracted that I couldn’t get back on track.

I think over the next few days I’m going to be mindful of what nudges me into this state. I’ll gently analyse what’s going on and try and see if I can bring myself back into focus.

Ideally, I’ll be finding the gaps in my foundation, fixing them up and understanding myself better so that work becomes even more enjoyable in the future

Routine update:Ā managed to get up at 6am, meditate, exercise (yoga) and make it to work before 8 šŸ™‚ now for day 2!

Image was taken on my afternoon cycle to the promenade šŸ™‚

Blog:Ā 189/365

Song of the day:Ā Alison Wonderland – Easy

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Morning Routine

Over the past year I’ve tried to implement a number of daily routines. The first was blogging, which has been highly successful. The second was daily meditation, which I managed for around 80 days before going off course. And the third was daily yoga, which only lasted a week.

I’m going to attempt to start another habit that runs during the week, inspired by Louis, and this would be an early morning routine. The main setup around the routine will be:

  • Waking up at 6am
  • 20min of meditation
  • 30min of exercising
  • A goal setting/planning session

I know it’s quite ambitious, especially since I am not a morning person. But I feel like these are things that I really want to be doing every day and that I know I enjoy.

I also feel like I start every morning on the back foot. Always dealing with busy work instead of feeling prepared for the day.

So tomorrow will be my first attempt at this. Wish me luck šŸ™‚

Image was taken in the Standard bank lounge on Thursday at 5am

Blog: 188/365

Song of the day: Muse – Undisclosed Desires

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Saturday Block

Saturdays are the most difficult day to blog for me. I usually spend most of the day sleeping, playing games, cooking and walking on the prom.

With this lack of engagement and doing anything new comes a lack of things to write about. There’s little opportunity for new insights.

It’s not a bad thing. It’s a day to reset.

So no real insights for today. Tune in tomorrow for some slightly more in depth thoughts šŸ™‚

Image was taken on the prom today šŸ™‚

Blog: 187/365

Song of the day: The Suburbs – Father John Misty

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Irrational insecurities

After identifying an insecurity, the next step seems simple: rationalize it with facts and then the insecurity disappears.

The truth is that it is much tougher than this. You can throw all sorts of logic and reason at an insecurity and it will be present in just as much force as before.

If you’re insecure about your successes, you might rationalize that you’ve done well, given that you have three degrees and a top consulting job.

But that’s not how it works. The insecurity will pop up at the next chance it gets.

And so we can’t fight it with a single, logical argument.

Rather, you need to slowly dismantle it over an extended period.

One brick at a time.

Image isn’t uploading, I’ll try to add one in the morning šŸ™‚

Blog: 186/365

Song; Gareth Emery – Concrete Angel

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Need to please

One of the downsides to being an achiever is the constant need to please people around you. In a professional environment, you go through great lengths to make sure everyone in your team is happy. At home you try to appease your parents at every turn. And you’ll force yourself to go to social occasions, even if you are tired, just to make sure you don’t let someone down.

This does make you reliable and dependable. People know they can always count on you.

The problem is that this is at a massive cost to your own well being.

At every one of these events you are placing the needs of others above your own.

Constantly trying to please others.

At the detriment to yourself.

The obvious solution is to prioritize yourself. Turn people away when you need to. Protect your own interests first. But this is difficult for someone who is used to basing their personality on positive feedback from others.

It’s tough, but we need to protect ourselves by saying no.

Image was from one of my happiest varsity memories, a trip with Lauren, Jess and Caito to Babylonstoren

Blog: 185/365

Song of the day: Want you back – HAIM

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But first, let me take a selfie

My friends, particularly those I don’t see often, know that at the end of a catch up I usually ask for a selfie. Regardless of whether we’re in public or at someone’s house.

The reason I do this is to have a bookmark of when we see each other. A reminder of the times we meet up. And I use things like google photos to group these photos for ease of access.

It’s a little cheesy. But at the same time, it’s something that is so great to look back on. I know that I have a picture for almost every major friend event for the last 8 years or so. A breadcrumb trail to link our current existence to our past. And a way to watch our friendships transform over the years

Image was taken at SARS on Monday. This cute kid borrowed the security guards phone to take a selfie

Blog: 184/365

Song: Kodaline -High Hopes

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Grade 8

Today we have our first guest blogger, my little brother Fabio. Here is Fabio’s blog, enjoy!

St Stithians Boys College is a massive step-up from the St Stithians Boys Prep, from all the new kids to having no fixed classroom. I personally love the spirit because it is really fun and at the same time deep (kinda like a poem). IĀ  also love the sports i am playing (B team Rugby and the A Rowing team). My favorite lesson is math (mainly because it comes easy to me (DNA from extremely clever older brothers)).

Looking forward I want to improve on my:

  • Rugby (I want to make the A team)
  • Afrikaans (I want to get above 60%)
  • My goal setting ability.

Thank you for tuning in, I will see you in a later blog.

PEACE OUT ROWANGSTERS!!! (Rowan+Gangstas)

Image was taken at Fabio’s rugby game on Saturday (Fabio is in the middle with Lorenzo on the left)

Blog: 183/365

Song of the day: You’re the voice- John Farnham

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